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ALFIE
by Peter Sobczynski

November 5, 2004

1/2 (out of 4 stars)

FILM CREDITS: Written by Elaine Pope & Charles Shyer. Starring Jude Law, Marisa Tomei, Nia Long, Omar Epps, Sienna Miller, Jane Krakowski and Susan Sarandon. Rated R

While not technically a remake, seeing as the original source was actually a novel and play by Bill Naughton, most filmgoers of a certain age going to see "Alfie" will be carrying memories of the famous 1966 adaptation that made an international star out of Cockney actor Michael Caine. They will find that this version has a lot going for it-some engaging performances, a couple of interesting twists on the material and one of the more attractive casts in recent memory-but is sadly missing one key element-a reason for its existence. Like too many recent remakes, it feels more like a studio-bred plan to exploit a familiar library title (always convenient for goosing DVD sales of the original) than an attempt by filmmakers to find a fresh approach at retelling a favorite story.

For those unfamiliar with the story, it follows the lovable cad Alfie (Jude Law) as he bounces from lady to lady in a lifelong pursuit of personal pleasure without any pesky commitments to break his stride. Speaking directly to the audience, Alfie takes us on a guided tour of his life and loves, including a horny housewife (Jane Krakowski), a sweet single mother (Marisa Tomei) and, after one drunken night, his best pal’s girlfriend (Nia Long). For a while, all is swell but in rapid succession, a series of personal crises-a health scare, an unplanned pregnancy and a bout of impotence-sends him to the brink of despair and causes him to rethink things. Attempting to turn over a new leaf, he flirts with monogamy-first with a gorgeous party girl (Sienna Miller) and later with a rich, sexy widow (Susan Sarandon, in a more-than-effective rebuke to the cheap shot comment in "Team America")-but when they also fail, Alfie is once again left to wonder what it’s all about.

Judging by the amount of lad magazines on the racks these days-the ones that are like "Playboy" with the emphasis on conspicuous consumption (booze, cars and the like) but without the pubic hair-the time would seem right for a modern-day version of "Alfie", one that would say as much about the current social climate as the 1966 version had. The trouble is that the original, for all of its dated qualities, has more to say about the contemporary male mindset than anything that co-writer/director Charles Shyer (who previously worked on retreads of "Father of the Bride" and "The Parent Trap") has come up with here. Instead, Shyer reaches for profoundity by featuring billboards in the background that archly comment on the material, having an old guy appear to lecture about the preciousness of life and by underlining dramatic moments by forcing characters to say aloud things that would have been more effective had they gone unspoken. ("I thought I was getting something for nothing, but I was wrong.")

Two aspects of the film really don’t work. One is the running commentary that Alfie delivers to the audience. In the original, this element worked because the glibness of what he said was a sharp contrast to his relative inability to communicate with the women in his life on any level beyond the physical. Here, the modern Alfie is just as charming and witty with the women as he is with us, effectively destroying the entire point of the narration. The other is the song score by Mick Jagger (working with Dave Stewart); this might have been a good idea in 1966 but it fails here because a.) the lyrics are too self-consciously on-the-nose to be effective and b.) the songs, as a whole, are really weak-not only do they sound like leftovers, they sound like leftovers from "She’s the Boss". (There is a pleasant cover of the famous title song by Joss Stone, though it is buried in the end-credit roll.)

There are some nice things about "Alfie"-Law is good at the unenviable task of stepping into Michael Caine’s shoes (certainly better than Sylvester Stallone or Mark Wahlberg in their revamps of "Get Carter" and "The Italian Job"), Tomei and Miller get a couple of good moments and the relationship between Law and Sarandon comes mighty close to pulling the entire film out of the bag-but there just aren’t enough of them to raise the film beyond the level of a soon-to-be-forgotten curiosity. Did you know that the original film spawned a little-seen 1975 sequel entitled "Alfie Darling" (with Alan Price replacing Caine)? I suspect that in a few years, this version of "Alfie" will be remembered by just as many people.

-- PETER SOBCZYNSKI

Copyright © 2004 Peter Sobczynski
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While the views expressed by Peter Sobczynski do not necessarily reflect the views of Criticdoctor.com, the Critic Doctor will occasionally examine Mr. Sobczynski's film reviews to bring forth an honest examination of those views expressed.